Honk if you love Jesus

I spent a good 30 minutes in parking limbo yesterday only to park the car 5 blocks away from the school i'm teaching at. Then when i got back up to the 5th floor, i couldn't even remember if i locked it. It's a good thing i drive an old car with a lot of "character" cuz nobody really cares for "character." (winky winkerston)

MrPerfect and I are off to buy me a bumper sticker today. Not so much because i really enjoy telling people to "Honk if you love Jesus," but because i made another fantastic little accident and covering it up with a bumper sticker is almost the perfect solution. Also, if there's like a food additive for instant better driving skills. I'll take that too. On my chili cheese fries. 

But when i say "driving" i really mean "parking." Cuz that's how i messed up my tail light :( I was parking in reverse (is that even the term for it??) and it went AWESOMELY, thank you very much. I was beaming with pride and while i was in the middle of high-fiving my wonderful passenger, we heard what sounded like plates breaking. If i had only stepped on the brakes a nano-second earlier, i would've stopped the butt of my car from hitting the butt of the black pick-up truck parked behind me. In my defense though, his butt was sticking out on my side like an obnoxious space-taker-upper. But i didn't check very well, and so it still ended up being my fault. As usual, i made absolutely no mark on the truck i brushed up against. MrPerfect and i were relieved to find out that the actual bulb is alright. I just broke the side of the plastic/glass covering it. We did manage to glue it back together though. And it looks like art. Done by a 3rd grader. Perfect. "Honk if you love Jesus."

I am one of those people who seriously SHOULD NOT HAVE A CAR. It's really not something i felt i needed or even really wanted. I've gone 26 years without it and i was very comfortable letting motorela drivers take me places. It's a big car for 97 lbs of me and it takes a lot of care and responsibility to drive...well, any car for that matter. And it feels like the only thing i can really do now is be more responsible. I simply have to be better. and MORE CAREFUL. Ugh. Being careful takes an awful lot of concentration. I should pray. You should too. That i don't park anywhere near you. Haha. 

I guess another good thing that came out from that ill-fated day was some content for my blog. Lol. Because my life just isn't exciting or interesting enough. It felt like i was going through a blogging slump for a while there and was seriously contemplating writing about how i was going through a blogging slump. Which is bad. So this is good. Hopefully the next entry will not include any more accounts of my driving mishaps :) 

In the subject i'm teaching at school is something the books like to call "The self-fulfilling prophecy." It's when you set yourself up for how you want/expect something to go. Like, if you were getting ready for a job interview and you're sure you're gonna do badly. Chances are, you will. Or when you're on your way to a party and you know you're gonna have a good time. Then you most certainly will. It's really good stuff and i was surprised to find such a biblical principle on a textbook. 

But it really is just declaring victory on your life. It's the act of proclaiming the goodness of GOD and taking hold of the victories that come with that. Here's a great place to be reminded of those promises --> http://www.whereisgod.net/stress.htm

Yay for God's word! (All together now!) No more scratches or dents and the like! Just safety and security and happiness on the road for you and for me :) 

"tremendous propensity for foolishness"

He said, 

"There's a kind of sin 

that becomes a life principle."

And it broke me 

because i knew exactly what he meant.


At the risk of sounding preachy, i'm just gonna come out and say this anyway. I think God is awesome. And that is a very good thing for me, personally, because i have a tremendous propensity for foolishness. I once drove around in the States...without a valid driver's license. If the cops found out, i would've gotten deported and banned from US ground and i would've deserved it too. When i look back on it, i always get this sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach. I just can't believe how much i risked just to get to Marshals so i can buy clearance cookies. Amazing, isn't it? Told you so.

My mom's leaving in March and i'm trying to spend as much time with her as i can. I took her to RaiRai Ken tonight and she really liked the ramen. So that was good. We've grown closer over the last few weeks and we're beginning to see each other's flaw in ourselves. So we decided to work on our flaws together. She's 47 years old and for an "old dog" (for lack of a better metaphor??) like her to try and learn a new trick is a gift in itself.

Sometimes, if we're not careful, our lives can get overrun with so much useless stuff. We can be so preoccupied with finding things to do or entertain ourselves with that we miss out on all these wonderful opportunities for growth. I speak from first hand experience and i'm not proud of it.

Who are you? Where are you going? What is your purpose? Who is your god? We spend so much time trying to make ourselves look good or feel good. Some of us go through tremendous lengths to "improve" their physical appearances (google Heide Montag). We stay for hours on Facebook trying to compare our lives with others. We wake up, eat, go to school or work, eat, and sleep. And it's like that for years. But is that enough? Is it enough to simply have a daily rhythm of tasks to accomplish?
Is it enough to just feel happy?

No, it's not. And it's a good thing too. GOD himself says in Jeremiah 33:3
"Call to me, and I will answer you, and I will show you great and mighty things, 
which you do not know."


I really appreciate the kind of God my God is. He took into consideration every single, solitary need you and i could ever have and then He wrote instructions on them. God doesn't just have love.
God IS Love. 
You and i are an object of that love and we need to start looking at our lives that way.

Numerous, great men and women have written better testimonies than mine.
But this is my own, and i'm just grateful.

God who created both order and beauty in the universe gives careful attention to the details of our lives.
Is there a better, more powerful truth than God's love?

"wacko chic" gives style advice

Okay, so this post is to illustrate how one might still be able to look good in clothes without exposing too much :) Feel free to try these styles out. I'm not claiming to be an authority on fashion. I really am quite anti-fashionista. I'm just trying to present another option to hot pants, micro -minis and halter or tube tops ;p Please refer to previous post for complete explanation. YAY for coverage!

First up, tunic shirts, the boyfriend shirt and white shirts :)

Reasons why they're cool:

1. They're comfortable.

2. You can eat as much as you want without worrying about looking bloated.

3. They look cute and sophisticated.

4. You would never have to worry about your fly being open. (which is probably the main reason i wear these tops) haha

Next, t-shirts, distressed shorts, cutoffs and the boyfriend pants :)

Reasons why they're cool:

1. You can take your lovely legs out to get some fresh air without exposing your cellulite. (which hot pants/ very short short pants absolutely DO)

2. You can look cool without trying too hard.

3. They'll all work with flip flops, flats, wedges and heels. No kitten heels though. That's sooo last century ago.

And of course, when all else fails, there's always the leggings.

That is, if you don't wear them in lieu of pants. Nevermind them Hollywood kids running around pants less. We're not in Hollywood, sweetheart. We don't need to draw so much attention and frankly, we really don't need our bottoms to delineate our back and front areas. They're alright to wear as pants if you have a long top, though--that's right, it's a science. It takes years and years to develop a natural discernment for these kinds of things...NOT. You're probably thinking "Hey who does this girl think she is? The leggings police?" YES. THAT"S EXACTLY WHO I AM. Leggings are not to be worn as bottoms but should aid in the coverage of the legs of women from all walks of life.

I was out getting my ramen fix with Mr. Perfect today. I was wearing the offspring of a tunic top and a dress shirt. It's nothing awfully fab. I just thought it'd be a nice addition to this entry. These looks are not ostentatious. They are wearable/workable, so don't be scared. In fact, whenever you're walking down the street looking fly in your new-found swagger. Think of me. As i will be thinking of you and how we're changing the world, one cool look at a time :)

Sitting Pretty

Back when i was in Elementary school, i always felt like my uniform made me look fat. It took me quite a while to figure out that i looked fat in the skirt because i wore bloomers under them all the time. Bloomers. Oh how i despised them. The garter would dig into my skin and i would get such a bad itch. They were uncomfortable and NOT COOL. I had a terribly un-pretty short haircut, much like the boys in my classroom and i was always desperately trying to fit in. All my clothes were ukay2x because that's what my mom used to do for a living--sell ukay2x, and i would wear high top sneakers. With. My. (Dress) uniform. So you see, my ludicrous way of dressing was pretty evident even then. But i think what really inspired me to style myself that way was because i didn't feel like i was pretty enough. So i made myself interesting. More than 10 years later, what we used to consider "wacko chic" (i.e. shorts + heels, t-shirt + pink tuutuu) is exactly what people say makes me interesting. So the plan i set in motion while i was 15 has worked. I've never believed myself to be beautiful. But i don't have to be. I'm interesting, and the 15 year old in me is very pleased.

This is really a test of (your gag reflex) how much tolerance you have for reading someone blog about how much she loves herself. If you feel nauseated, i must warn you that it will get worse if you read on. So, proceed at your own risk.

People have often called me fashionable (a fashionista) *ugh, yuck. i don't like that word*. And i would disagree with them every time. Because i'm not. I don't follow trends. If you read on, i promise there's more to this entry than just me yapping about how fabulous i think i am.

We just don't know any other term to use for someone who rocks their outfits. Let's just call it "being creative."

I am truly grateful even for my physical insecurities while i was growing up because it allowed me to explore other ways of finding beauty in myself. My dad, who taught us at a very early age to be modest, would only let me wear shorts that reach down to my knees...in kindergarten. I didn't even know what it meant. I had virtually no understanding of the concept of modesty vs. promiscuity. But even to this day, i've stuck to the ideal that my physical attributes (and my girly parts) are not what make me attractive. It's not my curves. It's not my legs (eventhough i have the legs of a Greek goddess) *haha*. It's not even my face, which i have no complains about. All the parts of my face work just fine thank you very much. We don't have to work so hard to look good. We just gotta be clean. We need to have clean hearts, and clean lives.

The bible says

"that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works."

(NKJV)
And another version says

"not primping before a mirror or chasing the latest fashions but doing something beautiful for God and becoming beautiful doing it."

(MSG)

I love that GOD teaches us how to dress and how we become beautiful by "doing something beautiful for GOD." I love God's fashion sense :)

little girls who dance at parties scare me

I'm not even gonna start with an introduction here. I am sorry. But little girls who dress like those half-naked dancers on prime time Filipino game shows are not gonna grow up to become very demure teenagers. I was completely shocked to see this one little girl bust a move that would put Britney Spears to shame. I just hope nobody else saw my reaction cuz i had to pick my jaw up off the floor...i was mortified. I could tell by the way everyone else was cheering them on, that they didn't agree with me. Little girls running around in micro-mini skirts and halter tops are cute, people say. And it's even better when they dance all sexy like the women in RnB videos with people throwing money at them. This is insane and it has to stop.
You know why? Because it doesn't go away when they get older.

The bible says, "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it."
- Proverbs 22:6

See? It doesn't just disappear with age. You will have in your hands, a teenager in micro-minis and halter tops shaking what her momma gave her.
When we set the guidelines so low, we corrupt their spirit. We set them up for a life of terrible moral standards. The times are wicked. This world and all its glory will devour the weak. And we don't want that for our children. It's time we stop letting little girls entertain us during parties. Whatever happened to good old karaoke anyway? Hey, i'll sing if you put the kids to bed or at least put some real clothes on them. D'you have anything from Mariah? Hey, it's a party, not an audition to become the next American Idol. (Which is the only part i really watch anyway!) Because i cry a little every time someone gets through to Hollywood. And i laugh a little too ;p You gotta admit, some of the auditions are pretty funny.

Hm. I really don't know how to end this post now. I guess a song should do. Let's soundtrack Saturday night then! See ya at church tomorrow!

why i love what i love

i love GOD because He is mine and i am truly His.
i love my mom because she makes me coffee every morning and says random beautiful things like "It's not so bad, we still got ice cream in the fridge." Or, "You're eyes look browner today."
i love my sister because i don't have a choice (haha); because we decided (ages ago) that "Stand by me" would be our theme song.
i love my little brother Daniel because he has the sweetest sounding laugh in the whole entire world and i miss him.
i love Sonny because he smiles a special smile for me.
i love my job (teaching) because i can get people to sit down and listen to me yammering; also because i can say stuff like "No sex before marriage," and "Kindly shut up."
i love my Mac because it allows me to blog anywhere i please without paying for it. Well, you gotta at least get a sandwich or something. You freeloader. Today it's Tuna sandwich at Gazebo :)
i love the little room me and my mom live in because you don't have to walk very far to get to the Tv or the dining table. You wake up and, BAM! You're in the bedroom, the living room and the kitchen!
i love the little dent i made on my car after trying to back out of a street one night. The enormous truck behind me was unscathed. and the nice gentleman let me off without a hitch. i might not get the dent fixed after all; we've agreed it adds a little character. It developed some more character since that night too, while i was pulling out of the driveway.
i love being me because i never have to try to look or act or sound like anybody else.
i love my Spring Valley/Valley Forge/Pennsylvania friends because they love me.
i love ballet flats because, as opposed to walking in heels, you can run and outrun people in the case of a zombie apocalypse.
i love being mistaken for the younger sister because it really helps my self esteem. i'm not even gonna lie about that. haha.
i love writing because it allows me the privilege of making myself seem more interesting than i actually am. plus, i'm a good writer.
i love singing because it's a way for me to enjoy music and be a part of it, somehow. plus, i'm a good singer.
i love window-shopping because it reinforces my belief in fashion--the clothes don't make you. An expensive, fashionable top will not help your character in any way. 120k for a handbag still sounds outrageous. You can send a kid to school for a whole year with P20 in some areas of the Philippines. They're not hard to find.
i love looking to the future because i have no fear of it.
i love dinner dates because we get milk and chocolate cake afterwards--which feels like being 12 again.
i love cheese because of its delightful taste and texture. Mmmmm. Cheeeeeessseeeee.
i love hoodies because it give me the "swagger of a college kid."
i love gloomy weather because it reminds me of winter.
i love taking the subway in new york because it's exciting. don't judge me.
i love thinking about my wedding day because i'm 26 and it's time ;)

but for now, let's just soundtrack Tuesday!

poetic disaster

Woke up at 8 today which is awesome because i've been a walking sleepyhead for a week now.
Decided i wanna wear a dress to my date later with Mr. Wonderful only so we could sit in a cafe for hours just holding hearts and making googly eyes at each other. Love makes me happy.

Saturday mornings are for writing...but i'm so uninspired.
So maybe i'll just just sit in front of my laptop and make stuff up.

(poetic disaster #1)
Like, i once was a monster who wore sneakers with dresses. Who threw up fabrics like "love" and "alright" and was ugly in every way--who wrote with recycled words--who grew plastic hair and lived in unwashed jeans. I was green and purple and stripes all over. I was lost. But i was loved, persistently.

It's amazing to which degree we can be ugly on the inside. Just thinking about who i used to be sends a shiver to my bones. It's not the Devil who is to blame for all the wrong we do. How incredibly convenient to brush off taking responsibility for sins we commit on the false pretense that the Devil "made" us do it. Believing in this lie will most surely lead us farther than we're willing to go into the enemy's territory--losing our lives, losing forever.

Whether you believe it or not, the truth is that GOD loves you, persistently. We are gonna go through joys and pains and through both, HE is GOD and He is good.

The last thing we did for class the other day was brag about 3 things. Many of my students are rich spoiled brats (just kidding). Many of them bragged about their physical attributes and the skills they have. It was quite a liberating exercise.
You see, society wants you to be excellent, but frowns upon you when you talk about how excellent you are. People applaud modesty...we like to hear beautiful people talk about their physical flaws, or successful people talk about their mistakes. We only really talk about our imperfections because it's admirable. So the good things about us (our strengths, our talents, and the like) are forgotten. After a lifetime of hearing ourselves only talk about our weaknesses and imperfections--we end up with a self-concept that's worse than what it truly is. You and i become fully-developed, walking and talking abominations.

And that's no way to live life. In Jeremiah 29:11 GOD says "For i know the plans i have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Whoever you are, wherever you are, you can hold on to the hope that comes from our very own Creator GOD. He has promised a future He himself has woven for each of us :) Ain't that great?

Now let's soundtrack Saturday!

Taxi cab drivers are the enemy

We (Mr. Perfect and I) are proud to have discovered the joy of "Hong Kong Fried Noodles." It's a food stand on the 2nd floor of Robinson's and it's the bomb. You gotta get the "chili and garlic though"...all the rest of the sauces are meh. Plus, chili and garlic is a pretty safe flavor. One time, Sonny (Mr. Perfect/SuperGeek/Bad*ss Drummerboy), found himself craving some ramen after watching "Naruto" (don't ask, please) and so we headed off to RaiRai Ken. I got the chili and garlic flavored ramen and enjoyed it. But you really can't go wrong with ramen anyway. I'm just saying...when in doubt, get chili and garlic.

I promised myself that i wouldn't drive until i get my driver's license, and so when LTO shot me down for having an expired student permit, i had to leave the car at my sissy's. It's hers for a month, until i ace that drivers' exam in February. Booyah.

Now, about them taxi cab drivers (and jeepney drivers). First of all, they are Martians who were put on the planet to terrorize asian female drivers. They will appear out of nowhere and disregard any and all traffic rules. They are like maniacal aliens (who don't shower and who listen to radio stations that pay homage to Axel Rose) who think that cars are made of marshmallows and that when 2 marshmallows collide, that makes roasted marshmallows. And, roasted marshmallows are a very good thing. So really, the only solution is to...

will sleep sleep over at your house and introduce you to toast and cream cheese

I woke up on somebody else's bed today. It was weird for a nano-second, until i remembered i was sleeping over at Gong's and Ed's. I brought wheat bread and Philadelphia Cream Cheese which they snubbed. But that's fine. The love for cream cheese is an acquired taste...not. But anyway, so far, i've mooched off of their coffee and internet. I will be heading off to work later, but before that. Let's soundtrack Wednesday, shall we?

whatever happened to pants?

Where: Limketkai mall

Time: 3:30ish

Aye: Don’t look at the half naked girl.

Son: They’re everywhere. I’m sorry!

Gone are the days when girls would be walking down the road, with actual bottoms. (Bottoms = pants, short pants, skirts, jeans, and the like)

Nowadays, it’s like, did you wake up this morning and decide, “Hey, i think i’ll forgo traditional coverage today and just wear nothing for bottoms.”

Many of these alleged anti-bottoms wearers simply mistake long blouses for mini-dresses. And it does not look good. I’m sorry. Now, turn around, go home and put some pants on. Or a skirt. Or some shorts. Any will do just fine. There is hope.

A nice set of legs doesn’t give you permission to objectify yourself. So you have nice curves, so what? Do you really want people to look at you in a manner that is impure? Those of you who know me, might go like “Maybe you’re just jealous because you have the curves of a 12 year old boy.” I do have the curves of a 12 year old boy…no punchline. No buts.

But the more important thing for all of us to know is how our Creator wants us to treat our bodies. 1 Corinthians 6:20 says “For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify GOD in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.”

Clothes are fun to wear. And every single time we resist the urge to flaunt what our mommas gave us, there’s a pair of bottoms out there that comes alive.

ho well

I’m sitting at a cafe all by myself thinking the holidays should not be this boring. We don’t have TV at home and i don’t trust myself alone at home on the internet because of my tremendous propensity for idiocy. So i’m here sitting at a cafe all by myself thinking the holidays should not be this boring.
The most exciting thing i’ve done so far is paint my nails pink. It felt like i was going somewhere where my freshly painted pink nails would matter. Nope. Not today.
I am getting a car though. BOOYAH. But the best part about it would be that i didn’t even ask for it :) it came straight from GOD and that’s amazing. It’s not real shiny. It’s not even brand new. It even came to a point where i would sit my mom down and tell her specifically that i DID NOT WANT or NEED a car. But it came anyways. I guess when GOD sets something in motion, it happens whether you like it or not. His will is always good for us, fo shizzle.
Right now, my mom and i are living in a single room upstairs to a carenderia where the walls are reminiscent of the cardboard boxes my sister and i used to play house in. But the fresh air is lovely and the very angry, excitable dogs living downstairs are lovely as well. So we’re quite comfortable.
We’re moving to a new house by the end of January and i can’t wait to paint murals on the walls. And i really wanna paint one room gold. Maybe it’ll turn out horribly wrong, maybe it’ll be like sitting there with the sun constantly bouncing off the walls…and the mirrors…and our guests foreheads. I imagine that would make lazy afternoon blah sessions (if i actually had friends who hung out with me—they’re all in the states) more interesting.
Hm…my coffee’s getting cold. Is anybody even reading this? Later then!

so i think i can blog eh?

Remember what the Mad Hatter said to Alice (in Wonderland)? That’s a stupid question because the Mad Hatter said A LOT of things. But at one point, he noticed that something seemed to be bothering Alice. He asked her to tell them all about it—to start at the beginning, and when she comes to the end, stop. I like using this reference because it’s so simple and appropriate for the occasion of a first blog.

The year is coming to an end. But when you think about it, how much does it really matter that you start the year right? I mean, i’ve never known one person who has been able to keep their New Year’s resolutions. Sure, it seems like the perfect time to start something good. Like beginning the healthy habit of drinking green tea everyday, or, quitting smoking. But once the New Year’s hype goes away so does your (and my) determination. As soon as February comes around, it’s just not interesting to even talk about it anymore—cuz by that time everyone’s trying to plan how to spend “Hearts’ Day.”

Maybe it’s time we recognize that we’re not as “good” as we wanna be. When we rely on our own standard for “goodness” and right living, we also inadvertently lower our standards. What i consider “goodness” may be to you, senseless extremism. What you consider “goodness” may be to me, foolishness. We cannot expect to live righteous lives just by trying to be “good people.” Because what are “good people” anyway? People who don’t drink alcohol? Are “good people” those who attend church every sunday or volunteer to lead Bible study? Are “good people” necessarily friendly and warm? Are you bad if you refuse to accept gay people? Are you a bad person if you listen to Lil Wayne’s songs? Who is it that we trust to define what’s wrong and what’s right? Society?

Society is a confused organism. It goes where most people are at. It does what most people are doing. It believes, approves, and loves any and every activity known to man in the guise of “freedom of choice,” “free will,” or just plain ol’ “happiness.” Much of what Society stands for is made up of false truths and the like. It violates what GOD believes, approves, and loves. A good example would be when people say “Just go where your heart leads you, or wherever you’re happy.” If that person’s heart does not belong to GOD, his heart will lead him down the wrong path. D’you know what the bible says about our unsurrendered hearts? It says in Matthew 15:19 “For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.” You would think that our hearts are naturally good, right? See, i would never have known if it didn’t say so in GOD’s word.

My sister once asked me why i am the way i am—with all my bible-reading and all that good stuff. The question came out of the blue and so did my answer. I was surprised to hear myself say…”D’you know any other truth in the world?”

I never saw the movie 2012. I just wasn’t up for the same “end of the world” storyline that would last 3 hours. Not that what i did instead was any better (play Looklet), but i just didn’t need another movie with stunning special effects to convince me that the world and life as we know it will end soon. It will. It’s gonna be glorious and terrifying at the same time (understatement). We don’t need to find out the exact date. The more important thing to think about would be…are you ready? think about it. it’s your life. and your afterlife ;)